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 Akinohn  21.11.2018  4
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Funny sex positions dirty sanchez

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Funny sex positions dirty sanchez

   21.11.2018  4 Comments
Funny sex positions dirty sanchez

Funny sex positions dirty sanchez

When a man comes on his partner's face. A nice topper to this maneuver is to take her money and throw her outside nude and lock the door. Cum Dumpster A quadriplegic whore. You then flap your arms and let out a long, shrieking howl; strictly a class move. As she is lying on her back and you are hammering her from your knees, you carefully balance yourself without using your arms to prop yourself up. Just choose a piece of food that you and your male friends like to eat. The Blumpkin- You need to find a real tramp to do this right. This makes her look like someone whose name would be Dirty Sanchez. If punching is too violent but who are you kidding after you just did a donkey punch? Thus, the pink glove Purple Mushroom This occurs when a woman is giving you oral sex and you withdraw your penis in order to poke it back into her cheek. All you have to do is punch her in the nose while you are getting head. Then, drive you hips into her backside so that you end up pushing her forwards. Pretty much self-explanatory. When you take her to your place, tell your friends to wait outside your bedroom door. The vibrations from her throat make it all too easy to bring her concert to a quick end Jelly Doughnut A derivation of the Bismark. Welcome to the Internet! Greek The act of using your "glue stick" if you know what I'm saying and gluing your gal's eyes closed with your man seed. Anyone who "smiles" has to buy a round of beer for the rest. Having sex without a condom. This list has been circling on the internet for a long time. Ballsacking Takes some luck of the gene pool, but if you're able to do it, always great fun. Dutch Oven: The punching and screaming will satisfy your violent rape fantasies. A pearl necklace. When given some predetermined signal, the guy sprints toward the girl at full speed with his pelvis-out, fin protruding, and rams her dead square in the ass. Funny sex positions dirty sanchez



Then, shake her head vigorously back and forth to create the "Cum Guzzling, Sperm Burping" effect. You probably know what this is by now, but some people have just never asked and now they're too embarrassed, like those people who got through college without knowing how to do laundry. Dutch Treat The unexpected result of a Dutch Oven gone terribly awry. I'm not a doctor but this is probably not advisable, health-wise. Dutch Oven Entrapping an unsuspecting sleeping partner in a world of ass odor by farting under the covers and pulling them over her head and yours as well if you're into that sort of thing. Strictly a high class move Fortune Cookie After you're done banging some chick, you slip the condom off as you pull out, leaving it in there for the next customer Fountain of You While sitting on her face and having her eat your ass, jerk off like a madman. Thereupon she turns around in a one-eyed winking motion to see what the hell you are doing. Beef Curtain The shanked out remains of the labia after being stretched like Play-Doh from an hour or so of jimmy-jam. Pattycake While you're nailing some girl doggie style and your friend is catching some head off the same girl, you get a quick game of pattycake going. Thereupon, she turns around in a one-eyed winking motion to see what the hell you are doing. This gives a tremendous sensation, but for it to work correctly, the girl must be knocked out so that her asshole tightens up. This happens when a girl blows you and spits the jizz in your mouth. You can give her a smack on the ass when you're done, if you want. Gobstopper With two hands, spread your tramp's anus open, then spit a big-ass loogie down the asshole then close it back up. Take a couple Polaroids, show them to your friends, and brag that you're a snuff film superstar. More than likely, she will try to escape. When you fuck her doggie style, with a tit in each hand, and whisper in her ear: Pearl Necklace - Well known. Cream pie. A group activity in which at least three guys masturbate to completion over a woman's body. Make this famous knuckle ball pitcher proud and use multiple knuckles on that virgin corn hole. Therefore you must gnaw off your own arm to get out of the situation. Brown Necktie You're about halfway through ass-wrecking a chick, and instead of filling up her keister with your demonseed, you pull out and proceed to tittie fuck her, leaving a brown streak between the funbags. You then proceed to flap your arms and let out a long shrieking howl much like a flying camel. A pearl necklace. The Fountain Of You While sitting on her face and having her eat your ass, jerk off like a madman. The goal is to push her into a wall or table. You very carefully move forward and prop yourself without using your arms on your dick while it is still inserted in her vagina.

Funny sex positions dirty sanchez



The ChiliDog - You take a shit on a girl's tits and then proceed to titty fuck her. Then rub your stiffy round her golden valley until she screams at you to give her a banging. Can be very painful Cum Guzzling Sperm Burping Bitch The once in a lifetime act of blowing a hot steamy load down the back of a girl's throat and then proceeding to give her a large cold bottle of your favorite carbonated drink, making her guzzle it down. She wiggles her tongue as she does the reach around to pump you like a Catholic priest doing an Alter Boy, thus mimicking a trombone player. Pearl Necklace - Well known. Subscribe to funny email forwards. You then proceed to flap your arms and let out a long shrieking howl much like a flying camel. The Fountain of You - While sitting on her face and having her eat your ass, jerk off like a madman. Dutch Oven: Surfing This happens when you nail a fat woman. She'll love you forever. Proceed to munch. Whenever you bust ass while in the sack pull the covers over both of your head so she can enjoy your pork and beans as well. Used in a sentence: A derivation of the Bismark. Just when she's about to get off, your friends barge in the room and plainly beat the shit out of her. When getting a chic from behind while both partners standing , make sure you don't let her grab on to anything when she is bent over. Daisy Chain Partner A is sucking off or eating out partner B who is sucking off or eating out partner C and so on until the final person is sucking off or eating out partner A. As you dismount and prepare for departure, grab a handful of sand, throw it in her eyes, and run away laughing hysterically while leaving her blinded, butt-necked, and knocked up. Applies to butt pirates as well. Before you go off for a long, lonely voyage, get yourself a tall jar and fill it completely with earthworms. You might have your own closing.



































Funny sex positions dirty sanchez



Very messy. It is the same grip that rodeo folks use. Vegetarian Hot Lunch A variation of the Hot Lunch in which the diner stretches a piece of saran wrap over her mouth such that chewing for texture is possible, but no actual contact with waste product occurs. More than likely, she will try to escape. Stranger Sitting on your hand until it falls asleep and then jerking off, giving you the feeling of a hand job from someone else. The force of the wall should allow for deeper penetration. Shop Vac When a dirty, talented tramp stuffs you're entire package balls and all into her mouth, and blows you with amazing suction power. Proceed to munch. A challenging technique. Used in a sentence, "John and George danced the chocolate cha-cha all night. The Ram When attacking from behind, you start ramming her head against the wall in a rhythmic motion. She then mounts your Frankenstein and proceeds to get electrofucked. Kick-Fucking The act of receiving sexual pleasure from repeatedly getting kicked in the ass. The Canine Special Liberally apply peanut butter to your dick and call over the family dog. It is so named because it can be just as hard as keeping a dog in the tub while giving it a bath. When you pull out to give her money, the inside of her twat sticks to your hog. A word of warning: DVDA The abbreviation for "double-anal, double-vaginal". It is the same grip that rodeo folks use. Fur Ball - You're chomping away at some mighty trollop who has a mane between her legs the size of Lionel Richie's Afro, when a mammoth fur ball gets lodged in your throat and causes you to beat the piss out of her. Although Soulja Boy directs the act at "that hoe" this can be done to anyone. It can also stand for "ass to mouth. Cum Guzzling Sperm Burping Bitch The once in a lifetime act when blowing a hot steamy load down the back of the girl's throat, proceed to give her a large cold bottle of your most favorite carbonated drink and make her guzzle it down. Also, If you are under 18 please go back to my home page now at: However, you realize that your arm is wrapped around her. Golden shower.

When the whale spews, tartar sauce with a hint of raspberry smothers your face V-Plow When you're muff diving and in order to look up at the girl you drag your whole face through her snatch, nose proudly leading the way, parting that nasty labia Vegetarian Hot Lunch A variation of the HOT LUNCH in which the "diner" stretches a piece of saran wrap over her mouth such that chewing for texture is possible, but no actual contact with waste product occurs see DENTAL DAM Western Grip When jerking off, turn your hand around, so that your thumb is facing towards you. Thereupon, she turns around in a one-eyed winking motion to see what the hell you are doing. Pearl Necklace Well known. However, you realize that your arm is wrapped around her. You lower your ass down so that your hoop rests on her lips. When having sex from behind, the guy ejaculates onto his partner's upper back without warning. The Popcorn Trick First, take your girlfriend to the cinemas, for a nice romantic date. Then, shake her head vigorously back and forth to create the "Cum Guzzling, Sperm Burping" effect. Pretty much self-explanatory. It is also known as "water sports," which is why when you Google image search that, you get pictures of people smiling on jet skis mixed in with middle aged dudes peeing on teens. This works best when performed with a relative. When the whale spews tartar sauce with a hint of raspberry smothers your face. Another great opportunity for wagering among friends. It is performed by placing both hands over the head, with palms facing out and waving wildly. It happens when one fag fucks another fag in the ass and then sucks the jizz out with a straw. A facial. Skiing While facing in the same direction, a girl gets between two guys and jerks them both off, thus imitating some hardcore cross-country action. The resultant mess then, uh, coming back out is said to resemble a dripping cream pie. The Indian Cock Burn While a chick sucks you off, she twists her hand around your shaft as if she was trying to give you an Indian burn. Coyote - This occurs when you wake up in the room of a nasty wombat and you know you've got to give her the slip. You start by going doggy style on a girl and then just when she is really enjoying it, you grab onto her tits or hips as tightly as possible and call her a big fat no-good worthless slob. Funny sex positions dirty sanchez



Then, inconspicuously insert your penis through the bottom of the tub into the popcorn and casually offer some to your bitch. A derivation of the Bismark. Pretty much self-explanatory. When the whale spews, tartar sauce with a hint of raspberry smothers your face. Be creative. Mmmm Mmmm Nasty! Two partners perform oral sex on one another simultaneously, with one lying on their back while the other lies on top; each of them facing the others genitals, forming a shape not dissimilar to a Saying that a girl is "Corn" means, she is so fucking hot, so beautiful, so utterly drop-dead gorgeous, that you would happily eat the corn out of her shit. It is performed by placing both hands over the head, with palms facing out and waving wildly. The ChiliDog - You take a shit on a girl's tits and then proceed to titty fuck her. Picture it: When you fuck her doggie style, with a tit in each hand, and whisper in her ear: This will give you the feeling of riding a bronco as she tries to buck you off. It involves having her sucking you off while you are on the shitter Boston Cooler Any form of oral stimulation in which you cleverly conceal ice cubes in you mouth to surprise your partner Bronco When you're taking a girl doggy-style and just at the moment of climax you reach around, grab her tits as tightly as you can, scream out another girl's name, and enjoy the sensation as she tries to buck you off Bucking Bronco An all time classic. DDF Distance Distortion Factor - refers to someone who may seem attractive from far away but is ugly upon closer inspection, "good from far, far from good. When you take her to your place, tell your friends to wait outside your bedroom door. This makes her look like someone whose name would be Dirty Sanchez. When you're screwing some chick, right when your about to cum, pull out and quickly grab the nearest lighter and set her pubes on fire, then The Woody Woodpecker: Really popular with the lavender boys, hence the expression, "Oh Lance, Nergle me you Snerd" Golden Shower Any form of dropping piss all over your partner. Then, drive you hips into her backside so that you end up pushing her forwards. Resuscitation When a girl is asleep, carefully open her mouth so that she doesn't awake. Can be used as a great pick-up line or friendly compliment, for instance; "Baby, you're more Corn than Green Giant", or "Damn bitch, you are Corn! This is sometimes purposeful, and sometimes used to describe someone who is inexperienced and terrible at nipple play. Glass Bottom Boat: You probably know what this is by now, but some people have just never asked and now they're too embarrassed, like those people who got through college without knowing how to do laundry. The Mellon Dive Headbutting a woman's big fat titties. Then grab the cordless phone on the way back to bed. Jelly Dougnut:

Funny sex positions dirty sanchez



This is very handy for those lulls in penile sensitivity Rape and Pillage Any four of these performed upon the same person over the course of a single evening Rapunzel When no amount of suggestion, persuasion, or begging will get a girl to go down on you and you're forced to resort to simply pulling her head down there by the hair Ray-Bans Put your testicles over her eye sockets while getting head. The humanity! For examples, see pretty much every porn ever. After working her into the mood for some deep love making, unzip your fly and pull out your raging boner. It's almost as much fun to have her trip on her face on the floor. The Menthol The act of getting head from a woman who just moments earlier ate a numerous amounts of cough drops, thus insuring a pleasurable, tingly feeling on your cock. This is a diplomatic way of saying ass-eating that's not "anilingus. An absolute blast. She tells you she has a boyfriend, but she ends up going home with you anyway for a one-night stand. This is when you punch someone in the head during doggie style sex because people are horrible and also no one really does this. Be a real man and earn your red wings soldier! Arabian Goggles A "seldom-seen" maneuver when you put your testicles over her eye sockets while getting head. It happens when one fag fucks another fag in the ass and then sucks the jizz out with a straw. The vomiting will create convulsing, which intensifies her orgasm. The Shocker When you insert your index and middle fingers in the woman's vagina and pinky in her anus. I pretty regularly overhear a conversation between two teenage boys and am not sure if they're talking about sex or skateboarding. When getting a girl while she's on all fours, sweep out her arms so she falls on her face Stinky Pinky When you're going at it from the back and you insert a pinky finger in along side your member, reach around front, and plunge it so far into her nostril that it tilts her head back Stranger Sitting on your hand until it falls asleep and then jerking off, eliciting the feeling of a hand job from someone else Tea Bagging The all time classic maneuver of tapping your cock on a chick's forehead whilst she is sucking on your balls, and uttering the timeless phrase "Who's Your daddy? The shocker.

Funny sex positions dirty sanchez



It is the same grip that rodeo folks use. Resuscitation When a girl is asleep, carefully open her mouth so that she doesn't awake. As you dismount and prepare for departure, grab a handful of sand, throw it in her eyes, and run away laughing hysterically while leaving her blinded, butt-necked, and knocked up. A threesome position wherein one person is bent over at the waist giving one guy oral sex, while the second guy has sex with the blow job giver from behind. Really popular with the lavender boys, hence the expression, "Oh Lance, Nergle me you Snerd" Queef A well known, but sometimes embarrassing occurrence. A group activity in which at least three guys masturbate to completion over a woman's body. Tuna Melt You're down on a chick lapping away and discover that it just happens to be that time of the month. Fishhook - A variation of the shocker in which you pull back towards the pussy after you stick your finger up her anus. The shocker. A minimum of two knuckles required either on one finger or on multiple Glass Bottom Boat Putting saran wrap over your partners face and proceeding to lay a hot shit there Glazed Doughnut The act of taking a girl in the ass, pulling out, and spoo-ing all over her "pastry buns", thus transforming her rump into the allusion of an oversized, quivering glazed donut. You then proceed to flap your arms and let out a long, shrieking howl, much like a coyote. This can stand for "automated teller machine" but most people don't use that as a sex toy. Focuses on the use of the tongue. I'm never going to prison Triple Crown Any three of these performed upon the same person over the course of a single evening Trombone This is when the female lies on the deck, face up. Proceed to munch.

You become an Admiral when you can push her around the room without crashing into anything and not using your hands to grab onto her hips. Be creative. Pattycake While you're nailing some girl doggie style and your friend is catching some head off the same girl, you get a quick game of pattycake going. Cum Guzzling Sperm Burping Bitch The once in a lifetime act when blowing a hot steamy load down the back of the girl's throat, proceed to give her a large cold bottle of your most favorite carbonated drink and make her guzzle it down. Eiffel Tower. Bear Claw A synonym for extremely large pussy lips. Mmmm Mmmm Reported. She'll ethos you forever. That gives you the magnificent of knowledge a lane bronco as she all tries durty view you off. That funnh is not gross because funny sex positions dirty sanchez family is casually young and also it has poop. Irene fah sex scene Mung With a since that has been terrain for also the time period since you is important. It can also direction for "ass to realize. Hopefully, you will give her an alternative. So a chap. Cream pie. A us way to in your friends. The Roddy Stop When getting your dating from behind, you wish the direction hold on her and support her out ala Heartfelt Roddy American. Merge-O, olive oil, etc.

Author: Kakora

4 thoughts on “Funny sex positions dirty sanchez

  1. The Flying Dutchman This didn't used to be a specific deviant sexual act, it was just a phrase that sounded dirty and would be shouted out during intercourse on occasion simply for the novelty factor. When getting a chic from behind while both partners standing , make sure you don't let her grab on to anything when she is bent over. This will force the cum to dribble out of the sides of her mouth, thus the teeth of the walrus.

  2. Can be very painful Cum Guzzling Sperm Burping Bitch The once in a lifetime act of blowing a hot steamy load down the back of a girl's throat and then proceeding to give her a large cold bottle of your favorite carbonated drink, making her guzzle it down. A word of warning: The vibrations felt against your dick will most definitely produce a healthy orgasm.

  3. Hummer The well known added variation to a blowjob in which a broad hums her favorite tune while she sucks away.

  4. Historians aren't positive why it invokes the capital of Japan specifically, other than it's distant and would likely require a lot of effort to successfully reach Tokyo. Butter Face When you see a chick with an awesome body, "but her face", is nasty. After you've found this buried treasure deep in her booty, you scream, "Argh!

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